does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I'm like, not good at living.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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