Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
