plz talk dirty to me
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
