Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
