i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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