Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
