I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
