Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
It's blow job season.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
