Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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