fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
