Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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