how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
