Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
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