I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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