I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
