Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
