we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Randomize
