When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
