CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
