fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
