absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize