Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I will pee on everything he values.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
