okay pat passed out under dana's car
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
