Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
