When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I think my moral compass just broke
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
