i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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