This is not my ceiling
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize