so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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