Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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