Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
