saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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