You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
