Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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