He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
