A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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