I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
