return my video game
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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