If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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