What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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