I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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