Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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