I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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