Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize