Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
