worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Randomize
