He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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