At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
