i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
