don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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