i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize